foodfluency.com

I made wiener schnitzel again!

I even remembered to save some lemon for garnish, and to put my greens on the plate. See, I’m learning! The point of this project, actually, was to play around with a different breading technique.

I used panko this time. That’s not too crazy. I doubled it again. That’s not too crazy either. But it was a little much. Double panko tasted great, but it also stuck together to itself and totally ditched the veal. It was almost like oil and water. I couldn’t get them to stay together no matter how hard I tried.

A slab of unbreaded veal looks pretty gross, for the record.

Okay. You probably think I’ve been slacking. Well, I have been, but only as far as blogging goes. I have dutifully been taking pictures of my cooking. And of course, enough time has passed that these are now mystery meals. Perhaps that says something about them.

It’s good to have a little mystery in life.

Hmm. I seem to be imagining history wrong in my head again. i can’t find any pictures. I guess that really does make this post crazy.

I have not forgotten you, chemotherapy recipes.

It’s just that, this is a really tough problem! I’ve been gathering information for the past few weeks. Gathering recipes that other people recommend, gathering food substitutions, and gathering lots of (conflicting) information about what people can and cannot tolerate on chemotherapy.

Here’s my unscientific list of that last so far:

Food that cannot be tolerated
Onions, many herbs, vegetable juices, broccoli, milk & dairy, ice cream, vegetables, chicken, chocolate, italian food, hot liquids, garlic, red wine, fried foods

Foods that can be tolerated
Dairy, potatoes, pickled things, chocolate, fruit smoothie, rice, ginger, green tea, greek salads, broccoli, green beans, caesar salads, starches, pasta, soups, sandwiches, fruit, chicken chop suey, salads, creamy soups, veggie soups, cheese, zucchini, lemon-flavoring, jello, banana bread, bananas, cool whip, scrambled eggs, toast, oatmeal, pudding, applesauce, tomato soup, baby spinach, dark greens, avocado, portabella mushrooms, goat cheese, feta cheese, scallions, strawberries

Foods that tasted different
Sweets, watermelon, ice cream, water, grape faygo (soda)

Foods that were easiest to taste
garlic, salt

Seriously, putting that all together is quite the puzzle. But I like puzzles. I LOVE puzzles, in fact. So I shall prevail.

In the meantime, does anyone out there on chemo have any input? What tastes good/bad/awful/bland? Lemme know!

I can only call this diet cake.

I hate that word… diet. And the way it is sneered about whenever I grab a low-fat version of something,”Oh, are you on a diet?”

I dunno. Sort of?

I’ve lost about 20 pounds since Easter, and the reasons for it vary. A lot of it is just cooking for myself. It hardly even matters what I’m cooking either; it’s all better for me than a steady diet of McDonalds. Cheaper too! I’m kicking myself for not realizing this sooner. Oh well. I’m also on weight watchers, which hasn’t forced me to do anything except track what I’m eating, which keeps my portions under control. But it’s also given me access to a lot of “low-point” recipes, which taste pretty awesome in lots of cases. And frankly, the “diet” differences have taught me a lot about how food works, and that there are many different ways to make a certain sauce, for example.

I prefer to think of the whole thing as re-learning how to eat.

But, I won’t deny that making your weight go backwards is a challenge. You have to learn what you can live with in terms of cutting corners. For me, it’s low-fat mayo instead of the real stuff. I can also let go of french fries. And I think I lost ten pounds alone by substituting my morning breakfast sandwich and doughnut for some cereal.

However, I have a sweet tooth. I refuse to let chocolate go.

So my ears perked up at my ww meeting this week, when the leader said, “You all know about making cake with diet soda instead of oil, right?”

I had never heard of such a thing, but most of the people there had tried it. You just take ordinary cake mix, and dump in a diet soda instead of the water, eggs, and oil. Sounds simple enough, and there are lots of flavor combos you could try. I used a dark chocolate cake mix with a vanilla cream soda, because that sounded safe to me.

And it tasted great!

I was so skeptical, but it just tasted like ordinary, store bought cake. Hardly gourmet, but, excellent for the people who insist on chocolate daily. And the best part is, if I made it the ordinary way, that one piece of cake would have contained an extra 200 calories. I am SOLD!

A few more pointers:

• Use the Waist Watchers brand soda. It doesn’t contain any aspartame which can be weird to cook with because the aspartame breaks down when heated, so I’m told.
• Don’t use an entire can. Dump a little bit out or take a gulp first.
• Top with fat-free whipped cream instead of frosting for additional “diet” goodness.

My next test is to see if my bf likes it. He’s more skeptical than me, but I think he’ll be surprised.

Cake please!

I feel like I’ve been slacking. Sorry ’bout that. It’s a combo of it being a busy time at work, and this damn rain sucking the life out of me (New Yorkers, you feel me, right?). I haven’t exactly been drooling on my coach eating cheetos, but I haven’t been cooking all that much either. That shall change!

In the meantime, I wanted to share this video on knife shopping. The two guys in it are bloggers for my local paper. The expert is Steve Barnes, who writes a weekly restaurant column. And the other guy is Matt Baumgartner, who, despite owning three successful restaurants, seems to be more clueless than me about food. It’s subtly hilarious and informative. I think Steve should have his own TV show. I’d watch it.

For his birthday, I got my bf a Wusthof Santoku knife. He knows what he’s doing and won’t accidentally cut his finger off like I would. He seemed quite pleased.

I don’t have any ridiculously nice knives myself. I got a real bread knife for Christmas though, and a hand-me-down chef’s knife. They made a world of difference to me. But I have to admit, I was terrified of them at first.

Here’s an anecdote for you. 11th grade. Some friends of mine decide to come over and watch a movie. After much debate, they settle upon “Children of the Corn.” Being my friends, they knew I wouldn’t like it. I don’t do scary movies. But being bastards, they brought it over anyway. Like the time they made me watch “Silence of the Lambs.” Heh.

The movie starts. The eerie music is playing. The kids are looking creepy. And then…

“AHHHH!!! THE SILVERWARE!!!!”

I honest to God ran out of the room. The forks and knifes were too shiny and were glinting menacingly. I could put two and two together. I’m no fool.

I am, however, still made fun of for “the silverware incident.” I also still keep my chef’s knife in its plastic covering, tucked deep into the drawer. I’m happy to report that I’m not scared to wash it anymore though. That’s progress.

If Christopher Walken can make cooking videos, so can I.

Thanks Kory.

It has come to my attention that certain Food Fluency readers do not want me to share my “Special Non-Bake Tuna Noodle Casserole” on the grounds that it makes everyone but me want to throw up.

Have it your way. I shall keep my secret recipe to myself. Losers.

Perhaps you’ll prefer this Martha Stewart version. It looks nothing like mine.

You non-video folks are missing out this time. It may be a discussion of taste buds, but I manage to include They Might Be Giants, poor German-speaking Harvard psychologists, capes, and more. Check it out:

Pertinent links behind the cut.
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Stay tuned for a food blog unlike any other.

Perhaps I should explain?

All my life, I’ve been a big failure when it came to food.

Consider the mint cake incident of 2002:

FAIL!

And more recently, the ribbon candy that decided it wanted to crystalize into a cucumber.

FAIL!

I know those are both baking, and not cooking examples, but trust me. The cooking pictures are too horrific to share.

I could blame my family, for not teaching me properly when I was growing up, and for interrupting my serious food concentration with shenanigans.

But that would be petty. And I might have to fess up to how my sister got covered in flour in the first place.

Instead, I have been working towards figuring out this cooking thing, step by step. The process can be painful, but I’m light years beyond where I used to be! Check out how excited I was when presented with my very first non-butter knife! I used it to cut bread dough. Watch out world!!!

Seriously though, for me, food fluency is more than just cooking. It’s understanding everything that has to do with food. How it tastes, how it looks, and, yes, how one makes it. This blog is going to chronicle my learning process. I’m kind of a “poke it and see what happens” kind of learner, so it could be really amusing.

Stay tuned!